High expectations imply utter happiness and bitter disappointment. May we all have both in our lives!

miercuri, 7 ianuarie 2009

Lose some, win some

Joyce said: We cannot give ourselves, because we are our own. I think he was right. No matter how much we give of ourselves, we never give completely.

There's no exhaustive I in possession of anyone else. Not even in the hands of those we love most. There is always a part of you that you keep, unknowingly.

So then, maybe total love does not exist, because you cannot love anyone inasmuch as to give yourself fully to him, to make him an accomplice of your entire being. He will never know the whole of you, grasp the utmost meaning of your feelings, because ultimately, you cannot share and communicate yourself fully. Does that make all love selfish? Maybe.

When you give up for good someone you love, you never gain back the part of you that you have given. So, nature has it all covered. Had we managed to give ourselves completely, we would have lost ourselves for good to the other. And we never would have got ourselves back.

Now, what happens to the piece of the other one we get? The one that gives himself to us? We take it in, and in the end, we are a mixture of the ones we loved, they enrich us, make us stronger, more interesting, they round us off. So, in losing some, there's always winning some, at all times.

Later edit: Ana m-a trimis la aceasta piesa dupa ce a citit postul. Mi-a marturisit ca a fost primul lucru la care s-a gandit cand l-a citit.

6 comentarii:

Anonim spunea...

A fost greu de digerat articolul asta ptr mine, chiar daca nu stau asa prost cu engleza.
Dar mi-a placut mult. E destul de trist, chiar daca se incheie intr-o nota optimista.

I just loved the way you put it in the end: "we are a mixture of the ones we love, they enrich us, make us stronger.."

Stefania spunea...

do anyone of you believe in destiny? :P

Anonim spunea...

I fully disagree :)

Plausible as it may be, and easy to grasp as "the answer", I find it rather fallacious to be honest.

For someone who has a certain level of emotional intelligence and a certain degree of understanding to what lies around them and what makes things "tick" on a more psychological level (I'm not referring to myself, rather speaking in general), this whole 'statement' will always be a fallacy. Why? Because such a person already knows what can and cannot be done and how to achieve this "higher" state of being.

If two of these individuals come into contact and become emotionally involved, everything is possible, solely because both these individuals have a better understanding of the human psyche and a higher acceptance of its limitless potential (therefore are aware how to "make things happen" - to put it bluntly).

Goes without saying that in our modern society, the chances of these two individuals to meet don't look really good. To make things worse, even if they do meet, they must also "click". And if need be, things CAN go even worse but I'll stop for now. It's something that resembles "against all odds" :-D

@Stefania: I do.

Anonim spunea...

P.S. I kinda neglected the ending of your post on purpose. My previous comment was directed strictly at the core of it and at its hypothesis.

The ending kinda reminds me of something Umberto Eco wrote in The Island of the Day Before (about exchanging "selves"):

"You could perhaps my Lady, yet save me. I have given you my heart. But how can I live without the very motor of life? I do not ask you to give it back to me, for only in your prison does it enjoy the most sublime of freedoms, but I beg you to send me, in exchange, your own, that could find no tabernacle more prepared to welcome it. To live you have no need of two hearts, and mine beats so hard for you that it can assure you of the most eternal of fervors"

Anonim spunea...

Blah, I hate it when I have to make revisions, it's only 4 a.m. so ... exqueeze me :))

Bottom line is: you CAN give yourself completely without loosing yourself in the process (evidently, stricly my oppinion). It's just a matter of ...

Cati spunea...

As you said in one of the comments, the basis of the post is just a hypothesis. Maybe we can give ourselves completely, maybe not. And most certainly, NOT all of us can do it.

Thanks for the reaction, I like the way you see things, maybe I'm just a hopeless pessimist:)but that's how I see it right now